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Actor jokes

  

14 Jokes

5 like 0 dislike
Neighbor: Haven't I seen you on TV?
Actor: Probably, I do appear on there off and on. How do you like me?
Neighbor: Off.
5 like 0 dislike
How many actors does it take to change a light bulb?
Ten. One to change the light bulb and nine to say "it should be me up there!"
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4 like 0 dislike
"My son says he's going to be a play actor. I think it's just a stage he's going through."
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3 like 0 dislike
How many actors does it take to change a light bulb?
Only one. They don't like sharing the spotlight.
3 like 0 dislike
What kind of wood doesn't float?
Natalie Wood
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3 like 0 dislike
Susan: I wish I were an actress.

Bill: Well, break a leg then!

Susie: Why?

Bill: You'd be in a cast for weeks!
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2 like 0 dislike
Why do stage actors like their jobs so much?
It's all play.
2 like 0 dislike
How can you tell who the dumbest actress working on a movie is?
She's the one sleeping with the writer.
2 like 0 dislike
How do children who act in 'R' rated movies improve if they aren't allowed to watch them?
1 like 0 dislike
What is the difference between an actress and a terrorist?
You can negotiate with a terrorist.
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1 like 0 dislike
HI MNAMES BOB
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0 like 0 dislike
What is the definition of a good actor?
Somebody who tries hard to be everybody but himself.
0 like 0 dislike
How many actors does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Depends on what it says in the script.
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edited by MC Hacker
0 like 0 dislike
Actors may be the ones on the stage, but the techs shine brighter.
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