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Alimony jokes

  
Requested in Relationships & Family by a contributor
edited by MC Hacker

14 Jokes

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Alimony is having an ex-husband you can bank on.
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What is alimony?
Funds which allow a woman who lived unhappily married to live happily unmarried.
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Is there any reason I need to be in the delivery room while my wife is in labor?
Not unless the word "alimony" has any meaning to you!
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GET YOUR EX WIFE, EX GIRLFRIEND, EX BOYFRIEND AND SOLVE ALL TYPE OF PROBLEM THROUGH COVENANTSOLUTIONTEMPLE@GMAIL.COM. My name is Enoch Davies
.my wife and I got married 6 years ago and we were so much in love with each other, we have 2 kids(josh and rebecca). One day my wife came back home from her friends place and she told me that she wants us to file for a divorce that she's no longer interested in our marriage, i was surprise and everything seem to me like a joke. after then i tried all my best to get her back but there was no way. but to no avail, my heart was broken, i wondered whats happening .i was on facebook when i saw a post on how  Dr Ewan helped a lady to bring back her lost husband. i was scared but because i love my wife so much and I am ready to do anything to bring her back. I decided to give it a try by contacting him via email:covenantsolutiontemple@gmail.com, So when i contacted him i narrated everything to him and he said my case is not a serious one that my husband will come back to me within 18 hours if i believe in his power.he told me to do some things to do which i did before 18 hours, my wife called me on phone and was crying for forgiveness. right now we are now a new branded family with more happiness, we are even going on vacation on xmas. please if any one of you out there is passing through same issue in your marriage, relationship issues contact Dr Ewan today or call or add him on whatsapp on +234905735398 or check out his webpage http://allwomenstalk.com/p/58034af4f725a97d108b4569. contact him today on covenantsolutiontemple@gmail.com now.
. I will keep on sharing the good news about this. Thanks Dr.
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MY EX IS FINALLY BACK TO ME

I was so depressed when my ex left me for another woman. it made me felt like i was not relevant and my heart and love life was seriously destroyed. i could not concentrate in anything i was doing. i went online and searched for help but could not find any genuine spell caster until i went to Ocala Florida to visit my aunt to ease the depression and loneliness. when i got to Florida, i explained to my aunt who then felt pity for me and told me the secret she have not told anyone about the success in her marriage with her man. she then took me to the temple of powerful Dr. Ugo Wonders whom i met and explained my problems to. he promised to help me because of my aunt. i trusted his words and provided him with the materials needed to help me get my ex back and to my greatest surprise, after 48 hours of casting the spell, my Ex cam back on his knees begging for me to forgive him. i was shocked and surprised at the magic. we are happily married now and everything is working fine with us.I promised Dr. Ugo that i will never keep this a secret because he brought back my life and my world and that i will hare my testimony to the general public.
    My advice goes to any one out there who is emotionally depressed or having any similar relationship problem, to contact Dr. Ugo wonders the ultimate spell caster via his direct email generalspelltemple@gmail.com or call his temple line on +1 386-336-9876 he is the best in Florida....
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how i got my ex boyfriend back after a break-up.
I'm Alvin Lee 21 yr old from UK,
My boyfriend left me when i was 7months pregnant. A week after he left, I found out he was dating someone who posted a picture of him kissing her in facebook and that she “loves this man”. I am sick to my stomach. I want him back I do not want to be apart much less separated. I love my boyfriend and I want to fight for him. I’m so scared of losing him. i knew my boyfriend and i also know that some thing else was involve on this, when i found out that this Girl use a Black magic spell on my boyfriend just to take him away from me, i was so devastating this as a result also destroyed my heart and soul because i love my boyfriend and i really want to get back with him i have seek for different counselling, nor could work out for me so i started given up on my boyfriend because there was no hope on getting back with him. one faithful night after my work,, I searched for help online and I came across a website that suggested Dr.Unity can help get ex back fast, restore broken relationships and stop a divorce. So, I felt I should give him a try.
I contacted him and told him my problems and he told me what to do, and i did it and he did a {love spell} for me. 28hours later, my boyfriend called me and apologized for the wrongs he did and promise never to do it again. Ever since then, everything has returned back to normal. Thank you Dr Unity for saving my broken relationships and brought my boyfriend back to me!"..
Me and my boyfriend are living together happily again. Dr.Unity is the best online spell caster that is powerful and genuine. If you have any problem contact him and i guarantee you that he will help you. Here’s his contact..Email him at: Unityspelltemple@gmail.com ,you can also call him or add him on whats-app:+2348071622464,or view his website:https://unitysspelltemple.blogspot.com.
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Seeking for help on how to get your ex lover back fast or save your marriage? Unityspelltemple@gmail.com is certainly the best, and his result is 100% guarantee..
I'm Alexandria, I read some testimonies about a love spell cast by Dr.Unity on how he has helped lots of people in bringing back their ex lovers within some hours, Sincerely I was just thinking if that was real and if this man could really help bring back my lover whom I love so much. I decided to contact him because I love my boyfriend very much and we have been apart for a couple of months I really missed him so much, I have tried all other means to get him back but couldn’t.I contacted Dr.Unity and he told me that my ex will come back to me in the next 11 hours, Dr.Unity  released him up to know how much i loved and wanted him. And opened his eyes to picture how much we have share together. My ex is now back to me again.As I`m writing this testimony right now I`m the most happiest lady on earth and me and my boyfriend is living a happy life and our love is now stronger than how it were even before our break up.All thanks goes to GOD and Dr.Unity for the excessive work that he has done for me by helping me to get back with my ex boyfriend. I would like to drop Dr.Unity  mail address and hope you see this testimony and contact him if you have any problem and i guarantee you that he will help you. Here’s his contact..
Email him at: Unityspelltemple@gmail.com ,
you can also call him or add him on whats-app:+2348071622464,
or view his website:https://unitysspelltemple.blogspot.com.
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how to get your Ex lover back after a breakup or divorce! Unityspelltemple@gmail.com is certainly the best spell caster, and his result is 100% guarantee.
My husband left me with two kids for one year, All effort to bring him back failed I thought I'm not going to see him again not until I met a lady called Jesse who told me about a spell caster called Dr.Unity, She gave me his email address and mobile number and I contacted him and he assured me that within 28 hours my husband will come back to me, In no less than 28hours my husband came back started begging for forgiveness saying it is the devils work, so I'm still surprise till now about this miracle,i couldn't conceive but as soon as the spell was cast,i became pregnant and gave birth to my third child(Michelle) if you need any assistance from him you can contact him via:email; Unityspelltemple@gmail.com , you can also call him or add him on Whats-app: +2348071622464 and tell him I referred you to him
Elizabeth valdivia.
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Thanks to Dr.Unity for bringing back my wife and brought great joy to my family!! Unityspelltemple@gmail.com is certainly the best spell caster online,If you need Ex lover back fast! and his result is 100% guarantee..
 
A very big problem occurred in my married between me and my wife so terrible that she took the case to court for a divorce she said that she never wanted to stay with me again,and that she did not love me anymore So she packed out of my house and made me and my children passed through severe pain. I tried all my possible means to get her back,after much begging,but all to no avail and she confirmed it that she has made her decision,and she never wanted to see me again. So on one evening,as i was coming back from work,i met an old friend of mine who asked of my wife So i explained every thing to her,so she told me that the only way i can get my wife back,is to visit a spell caster,because it has really worked for her too So i never believed in spell,but i had no other choice,than to follow her advice. Then she gave me the email address of the spell caster whom she visited.(Unityspelltemple@gmail.com}, So the next morning,i sent a mail to the address she gave to me,and the spell caster assured me that i will get my wife back the next day what an amazing statement!! I never believed,so he spoke with me,and told me everything that i need to do. Then the next morning, So surprisingly, my wife who did not call me for the past seven months,gave me a call to inform me that she was coming back So Amazing!! So that was how she came back that same day,with lots of love and joy,and she apologized for her mistake,and for the pain she caused me and my children. Then from that day,our relationship was now stronger than how it were before,by the help of a spell caster . So, was now stronger than how it were before,by the help of a spell caster . So, i will advice you out there, If you have any problem contact him and i guarantee you that he will help you. Here’s his contact..Email him at: Unityspelltemple@gmail.com ,you can also call him or add him on whats-app:+2348071622464,or view his website:https://unitysspelltemple.blogspot.com.
Stephen Hill
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Hi everyone,
Real & Powerful Love spell caster to get your Ex lover back fast online.
I'm so excited.
My ex-boyfriend is back after a breakup,I’m extremely happy that will are living together again.
My name is Silvia Soulez
My boyfriend of a 4yr just broke up with me and am 30 weeks pregnant.I have cried my self to sleep most of the nights and don’t seem to concentrate during lectures sometimes I stay awake almost all night thinking about him and start to cry all over again.Because of this I end up not having energy for my next day’s classes ,my attendance has dropped and am always in uni and on time.Generally he is a very nice guy ,he ended it because he said we were arguing a lot and not getting along.He is right we’ve been arguing during the pregnancy a lot .After the break up I kept ringing him and telling him I will change.I am in love with this guy and he is the best guy I have ever been with.I’m still hurt and in disbelief when he said he didn’t have any romantic feelings towards me anymore that hurt me faster than a lethal syringe.He texts me now and then mainly to check up on how am doing with the pregnancy,he is supportive with it but it’s not fair on me, him texting me as I just want to grieve the pain and not have any stress due to the pregnancy.i was really upset and i needed help, so i searched for help online and I came across a website that suggested that Dr.Goodluck can help solve marital problems, restore broken relationships and so on. So, I felt I should give him a try. I contacted him and he told me what to do and i did it then he did a spell for me. 17 hours later, my bf came to me and apologized for the wrongs he did and promise never to do it again. Ever since then, everything has returned back to normal. I and my bf are living together happily again.. All thanks to Dr.Goodluck. If you have any problem contact Dr.Goodluck now and i guarantee you that he will help you.Email him at: goodluck05spellcaster@gmail.com
Call or Whats-app him: +2348138654465
website:http://drgoodluck.simplesite.com
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Best online help to save your marriage or relationship, contact Dr Ewan now, a trust worthy man that can help you solve all your problem within the space of 6 hours contact him today on his email covenantsolutiontemple@gmail.com, or contact contact him through whats-app +2349057353987.  He saved my marriage
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My boyfriend left me for another girl. I needed him back desperately because i loved him so much. I became very worried and needed help. as i was browsing through the internet, I came across a website that suggested that Dr.Ebuka can help get ex back fast and stop a divorce or breakup and so on , So I felt I should give him a try. I contacted him and he told me what to do and i did it then he did a (return Love spell) for me. 28 hours later, my boyfriend came back to me crying and begging for my forgiveness. Today I'm so happy and i want to recommend this great spell caster to anyone that truly needs an urgent solution to his or her broken relationships and marriage. Simply contact the great "Dr.Ebuka" If you have any problem contact him and i guarantee you that he will help you., Thank you Dr Ebuka  for saving my broken relationships and brought my boyfriend back to me!" email him at: ebukalovetemple@gmail.com ,you can also call him or add him on +13103599685 ....
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lobster
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MARVELSPELLTEMPLE@GMAIL.COM IS A GENIUS AND GOD SENT FOR REAL.
I am 32 years old Father of two kids. This is certainly a shocking and a genuine Testimony i have ever seen.. I visited a forum here on the internet after i had an argument with my wife and my marriage of 7 years was broken down and i was totally inconsolable and without hope because i have tried all means to get back my wife after much pleading and did everything possible to make sure that she comes back, but nothing worked out and I have thought of suicide at times.... i saw a marvelous testimony of this powerful and great spell caster called Dr MUNA on the forum.. And i read how He reunited a family and brought the Husband of a woman back to her in just 24 hours..I never believed it, because i never heard nor learnt anything about magic before.. Not a soul would have been able to influence me about magical spells, until Dr MUNA did it for me and restored my marriage back and brought my spouse back to me in the same 24 hours just as i read on the internet..i was truly astonished and shocked when my WIFE came to my house and knelt down begging for forgiveness, for me to accept her back.. I am really short of expressions, and i don't know how much to convey my appreciation Dr MUNA is certainly a God sent to me and my family.. he did his work just as he guaranteed me in 24 hours and it yielded an optimistic result to me and i was able to get back my wife. Right this moment my wife has falling so much in love with me and my kids like never before. This spell casting isn't brain washing but opened up her eyes to see how much i love and wanted her, i really don't know how best to be grateful for bringing happiness into my life and family, and now i am a joyful man once again. You can get back your spouse too Contact DR MUNA now...  marvelspelltemple@gmail.com Whatsapp number +2348071660388

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