Fake Magnetic Bumper Stickers
Facebook Thumbs Down2,901,438 people dislike this

Roadkill T-ShirtsYou are a pill babe



Fake Parking Tickets
Being an idiot isn't a crime so you're free to go

Smartass Shirts

Christmas jokes

  

12 Jokes

1 like 0 dislike
Why was Christmas cancelled?
You told Santa Claus you had been good this year and he died laughing!
1 like 0 dislike
Why's Christmas just like a day at the office?
You do all the work but the fat guy in the suit gets all the credit.
1 like 0 dislike
Letter to Santa Claus...

Dear Santa Claus,

I stayed up all night last Christmas and I didn't see you come down the chimney? Are you going to come this year?

Sincerely,
Timmy

*****

Dear Timmy,

Get a clue kid! Do you think there's time to make it to every house? Put a hundred next to the cookies this time and I'll see if I can pull some strings.

Santa
0 like 0 dislike
On Christmas Eve mom is preparing last-minute decorations in the family room. Her daughter Sally tells her not to forget putting out the treat for Santa by the fireplace. The mom thanks Sally and hurries to the kitchen for the treat. When she later puts Sally to bed she says "Mom, why did you put a can of Slim-Fast by Santa's treat?" Anxious to get back downstairs to finish the decorations mom replies "Daddy is on a diet."
0 like 0 dislike
On Christmas the judge asked the accused "What are you charged with?"
"Doing my Christmas shopping early," the defendant said.
"That's no crime," said the judge. "How early were you doing it?"
"Before the store opened."
0 like 0 dislike
Boss: Who said that, just because I tried to kiss you at last month's Christmas party, you don't have to do your work around here?
Secretary: My lawyer.
0 like 0 dislike
Why doesn't Santa Claus have any children?
Because he only comes once a year. When he does it's down the chimney.
0 like 0 dislike
Husband: Do you think it will snow Christmas Eve night, honey?
Wife: No, I think it will reindeer.
0 like 0 dislike
T-Shirt: I'm not Santa but you can still sit on my lap!
0 like 0 dislike
Did you hear Santa is getting a divorce?
He got caught laying a doll under the tree last year.
Shared by a contributor
0 like 0 dislike
Why are women's breasts like a train set a kid gets on Christmas?
They were originally made for children but it's the fathers who want to play with them.
0 like 0 dislike
Why is there an L in NOEL?
Shared by a contributor

Your joke

Anti-spam verification:
To avoid this verification in future, please log in or register.
Jokes contributed may be rewritten, recategorized, removed, and/or reordered for any reason. Deal with it.

Related jokes

0 jokes
Requested in Misc. Themes by a contributor
3 jokes
Requested in Childrens & Clean by a contributor
What do elves learn in school? The elf-abet
7 jokes
Requested in Childrens & Clean by MC Hacker
Half of American shoppers buy gift cards at Christmas. The other...
2 jokes
Requested in Entertainment & Arts by a contributor
What do elves learn in school? The elf-abet!
3 jokes
Requested in Childrens & Clean by Jokester
Elf: Why do Dasher and Dancer take so many coffee breaks? Santa:...