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Dirty Blonde jokes

  
Requested in Adult & Dirty by Argo
edited by MC Hacker

28 Jokes

4 like 0 dislike
Why can't blondes count to 70?
Because 69 is a bit of a mouthful.
2 like 0 dislike
Did you hear about the blonde who realized sex wasn't a pain in the ass?
Someone told her to turn over.
2 like 0 dislike
Why is 68 the maximum speed for blondes?
Because at 69 they blow a rod.
1 like 0 dislike
Did you hear about the blonde who dropped out of nursing school?
She was doing great until she found out she would have to perform the Hymenlick Maneuver!
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1 like 0 dislike
What is the irritating part around a blonde's pussy?
The other guys waiting their turn!
1 like 0 dislike
What do blondes and turtles have in common?
Once you get them on their backs they're fucked!
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1 like 0 dislike
What is 68 to a blonde?
Where she goes down on you and you owe her one.
1 like 0 dislike
How does a blonde hold her liquor?
By the ears
1 like 0 dislike
How do you know when a blonde has been eating?
There's a belt buckle mark on her forehead.
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1 like 0 dislike
Why does a blonde insist on him wearing a condom?
So she can have a doggie bag for later!
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0 like 0 dislike
A blonde and a brunette were discussing their boyfriends.

Brunette: Last night I had *3* orgasms in a row!
Blonde: That's nothing. Last night I had over a hundred.
Brunette: My god! I had no idea he was that good.
Blonde (looking shocked): Oh, you mean with just 1 guy?
0 like 0 dislike
What do you call a blonde with a dollar on the top of her head?
All you can eat, under a buck.
0 like 0 dislike
How do you know when a blonde has been working on your computer?
There's White-Out on the screen and lipstick on the joystick!
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Two blondes are passing by a fruit stand when the grocer calls to them "bananas! 50 cents each or three for a dollar!" The girls stop and look at each other. One says to the other "well, I suppose we could always eat the third one!"
0 like 0 dislike
How can you tell if a blonde is a redneck?
If she can chew tobacco and suck dick at the same time and still know which one to spit out!
0 like 0 dislike
What do blondes and spaghetti have in common?
They both wiggle when you eat them.
0 like 0 dislike
What did the blind blonde say as she was making love with her new boyfriend?
"Funny, you don't feel Jewish!"
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0 like 0 dislike
What do the Bermuda Triangle and blondes have in common?
They've both swallowed a lot of semen.
0 like 0 dislike
Why do blondes wear hoop earrings?
So they have a place to rest their ankles.
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0 like 0 dislike
What do you call pigtails on a blonde?
Handlebars
0 like 0 dislike
Why don't blondes like anal sex?
They don't like their brains being screwed with.
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0 like 0 dislike
Why is a blonde like a washing machine?
Because they both drip when they are fucked.
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0 like 0 dislike
Why are there lipstick stains on the steering wheel after a blonde drives a car?
Because she blows the horn.
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0 like 0 dislike
What is a blonde?
A redhead with the fire fucked out of her!
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0 like 0 dislike
Why did the blonde give a blow job after sex?
She wanted to have her cock and eat it too!
0 like 0 dislike
How can you tell if a blonde has a vibrator?
She has a chipped tooth.
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0 like 0 dislike
Why don't they let blondes swim in the ocean?
Because they can't get the smell out of the tuna!
0 like 0 dislike
A cop pulled I've a blonde and as he approached the car he noticed his zipper was down. And then she saw it and said OH NO NOT ANOTHER BREATHALYZER!
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