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Dirty Gay jokes

  
Requested in Adult & Dirty by Argo
edited by MC Hacker

82 Jokes

52 like 0 dislike
What do gay guys have in common with bungee jumpers?
If the rubber breaks, they're in deep fucking shit!
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How do you know if your husband is gay?
You stick a dildo in his hole!
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30 like 0 dislike
I was going to tell you a gay joke buttfuck it.
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There are two gay guys about ready to have sex. The door bell rings and one gay guy says "I will go get the door but don't start without me." After he comes back into the room there is cum everywhere. The gay guy says "I thought I told you not to start without me." He says "I didn't. I farted!"
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23 like 0 dislike
What do you get if you cross a gay midget with a vampire?
Cocksucker!
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What did one gay sperm say to the other?
"How do we get out of this shit?"
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I promised myself I wouldn't make fun of homosexuals anymore. Butt fuck it, they're cunts.
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Two condoms were walking past a gay bar. One asks the other "you wanna go in and get shitfaced?"
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What do you call a gay dinosaur?
A Megasoreass
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What is the first symptom of AIDS?
A pounding sensation in the ass!
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What does GAY stand for?
Got AIDS Yet?
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How do you know you're at a gay picnic?
The hotdogs taste like shit.
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What's the difference between a refrigerator and a homo?
The fridge doesn't fart when you pull the meat out.
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What is a gay masochist?
A sucker for punishment
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Why do gay men fake orgasms?
Because they will be in deep shit if they don't!
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How do you get four gay guys on a barstool?
Turn it upside down.
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How do you get a gay man to have sex with a woman?
Shit inside her cunt!
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8 like 1 dislike
On straight dates it's common for the man to pull out the woman's chair. On gay dates it's common for one man to push in the other's stool.
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How do you make a gay man scream twice?
Fuck his ass. Then wipe your dick on his carpet!
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How do you know when you are in a gay church?
Only half the congregation is kneeling.
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What did the gay deer say when he walked out of the bar?
I can't believe I blew 50 bucks!
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What do you call a gay drive by?
- a fruit roll up
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Q: How does a gay guy know he can take a dick?

A: When he says, "I shit bigger logs than that"!
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What can turn a fruit into a vegetable?
AIDS
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What does a gay order in a Chinese restaurant?
Som Young Guy
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What's the most favorite diner in a gay home Beefstrokenoff!
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Why aren't gay guys vegetarian?
Because they like to eat wieners.
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Yo momma so gay (s)he fucked your dad's ass!
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What's the difference between a gay guy and a refrigerator?
One doesn't fart when you pull meat out of it
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From January this year a registration as gay with RBGR simultaneously and irrevocably is valid througout Europe. Not until now the five freedoms are fully in force.
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How do you know if your newborn is gay?
He'll only suck his pacifier if there is hair on it.
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What do you get when you cross an Eskimo and a homo?
A snowblower
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how can you tell your team mate is gay?
He suck at every game
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Why do gay guys live above a chip shop?

Because they like the smell of battered sausage
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What do you call 4 lesbians in a closet
A licker cabinet
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you: do you like dragons?
him yea.
you: then your gonna love/hate it when
im dragon these nuts on your face
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What lesbian Eskimos are called this Klondikes
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A man walks into the doctors office and asks for a gay test. The doctor takes a large rod in his hand and says "  I'm going to shove this up your rectum. If you don't like it make an animal sound.... if you do sing a show tune." As he sticks it in her hears... "MOOOOOOnnn river.
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2 like 0 dislike
Which are the two highlights at the dinner of the gay ones? The speech to the man and the speech to the man.
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The hetero-married gay bought a dog. Maybe he's tri-.
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Why do gay people always find their way to the Eiffel Tower when they travel to Paris? They took a gayded tour.
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What happens to a man who spends the night at a gay bar?
He wakes up with a queer taste in his mouth.
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there are three gay guys going skiing but they get to the place at like 12:00 at night yea.. and when they get there they find out that there is only one room left with a single bed in it! so they had to share after that night they all said they had a good dream the first two said they had a dream they were getting handjobs and the last one said ha thats funny i had a dream i was skiing !!!
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1 like 0 dislike
Q: What did the Trix rabbit say to the homosexuals?
A: Silly faggots, dicks are for chicks!
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What do gay guys call an upside down chair? A table for four!
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Q: who's king of the gays
A: Austin "Gayness" Walley
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how can you tell if you best friend is gay?  his dick taste shitty...
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what did one gay sperm say to the other.
I can't see in here with all this shit in my eyes
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Q Why have the waters around San Francisco been full of trash fish but devoid of edible  game fish?
A Fish biologists don't know but suspect it's because the waters were clogged with suckers, blow fish and trouser trout.

A queer was fired from the sperm bank for drinking on the job.
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1 like 0 dislike
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Getting ex boyfriend back after a breakup,
I’m extremely happy that will are living together again.
Am Maria 21yr from England, my boyfriend of a 4yr just broke up with me and am 30 weeks pregnant.I have cried my self to sleep most of the nights and don’t seem to concentrate during lectures sometimes I stay awake almost all night thinking about him and start to cry all over again.Because of this I end up not having energy for my next day’s classes ,my attendance has dropped and am always in uni and on time.Generally he is a very nice guy ,he ended it because he said we were arguing a lot and not getting along.He is right we’ve been arguing during the pregnancy a lot .After the break up I kept ringing him and telling him I will change.I am in love with this guy and he is the best guy I have ever been with.I’m still hurt and in disbelief when he said he didn’t have any romantic feelings towards me anymore that hurt me faster than a lethal syringe.He texts me now and then mainly to check up on how am doing with the pregnancy,he is supportive with it but it’s not fair on me, him texting me as I just want to grieve the pain and not have any stress due to the pregnancy.i was really upset and i needed help, so i searched for help online and I came across a website that suggested that Dr Unity can help solve marital problems, restore broken relationships and so on. So, I felt I should give him a try. I contacted him and he told me what to do and i did it then he did a spell for me. 28 hours later, my bf came to me and apologized for the wrongs he did and promise never to do it again. Ever since then, everything has returned back to normal. I and my bf are living together happily again.. All thanks to Dr Unity. If you have any problem contact Dr.Unity now and i guarantee you that he will help you.Email him at: Unityspelltemple@gmail.com ,you can also call him or add him on whats-app: +2348071622464.
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At the head office of RBGR there are also five negroe gay testers, out of which three are negroes themselves. However all of them are gay.
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Should gay people be allowed to marry? Yes of course, however if it is actually to be called marriage is rather a matter of how eager they gay people are themselves to exhibit their perversity.
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I'm gay send me picks of your cock hahahaha
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A college guy stumbles into his room late Friday night.  He tells his roommate, "I couldn't get past first base with any chick tonight."

His roommate says, "Are you into guys?  I'd do you."
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How does a gay guy enter a nightclub?

Through the back door
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what do you call a cat that suck his dick sicker dick
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When I was younger I used to think I was gay but then I found out that playing with yourself doesn’t count.
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Q: How many drag queens does it take to change a light bulb?

A:  Only one but is still takes 3 hours to get ready for it.

A:  Two.  One to change the bulb and the other to scream "out of my way bitch you're in my light".

A:  10.  One to change the bulb and 9 others to bitch about it.
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I'm Straight.
So Are Spaghetti  Until You Get Them Wet And Hot.
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There were once these three gay people they all died and got there ashes cremated so they had to think of something to do  with them so one person said my bobby liked flying so I'm going to scatter his ashes in the sky the second person said my jimmy liked fishing so I'm going to scatter his ashes at our favourite lake the third person said I'm going to scatter my brad in my cury so he can screw my ass one more time.
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How does Company X describe its efforts for diversity among employees? In its anal report.
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If two gay people get a child, how can the family situation be described for at least one of them? One bonus child and one bonus penis.
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The French gay community made a revolution last night, under the motto "complementarité, continuité, compatibilité".
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Did you see the cradle of the gay ones? Josef, Josef and the three bise men.
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What did the gay man do after registering an account on LinkedIn and connecting with all his friends? Joined the group HIV-positive.
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What can you read at the LinkedIn-profile of the gay Person X? Person X penis is now connected to Person Y's anus, and three further people. Person X has an up-dated sexual orientation.
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How can you know that it is the same gay people who return to the pride parade every year? They are ring-marked.
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What happens when two just married gay people exit the church building? The guests each throw one handful of maccaronis, painted with watercolours in all the colours of the rainbow, in the direction of the couple.
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Can you decribe the wedding ceremony between two gay people? The officiant crosses his fingers, glances into the ceiling and says gayelidoo, gayelidaa, while he at the same time farts into the faces of the gay people, in order to reply with the same language.
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Should gay people be allowed to try go get a child? Of course, but so far relatively few have succeeded in that ambition.
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What do you mean registered partnership? Which register are we actually talking about? RBGR or what (Royal British Gay Register)?
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Prior to living as gay a person must pass the examination of a gay tester at RBGR, otherwise he might be senstenced to up to five years of prison for false-gaying or up to ten years for pseudo-gaying. The testing procedure includes among other things the passing through a special gay detector.
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To demonstrate their commitment to the diversity issue, two politicians this year walked in the second line of the pride parade and played the flute in tandem with two gay persons in the first line.
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A Swedish politican presented the follow-up of his bestseller "He who is indebted is not free", which is "He who is gay is not healthy".
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What happens to a person approved as gay by RBGR? He is being given a gay number, consisting of the date of the day along with the four last digits, which henceforth will replace the personal registration number in all contacts with authorities. Subsequently the four last digits are being tatooed in the ass of the gay, two digits on the left side and two on the right.
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What about homosexuality and Christianity? Of course the homosexuals shall be allowed to practice their religion, just like the Christians.
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Why are so many gay people members of the scout movement? They've got the BP spirit (see above).
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In a crossword: Man without penis, three letters downward vertical, starts with a g.
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What can be argued against the liberal line? Last week I read a Swiss study, referred to in Neue Zürcher Zeitung, according to which five out of ten gay people can be cured by a good thrashing.
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How can you make a gay man scream twice? Fudge him real hard. Then wipe your dick off on his curtains.
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I was lost with no hope for my husband was cheating and had always got away with it because i did not know how or always too scared to pin anything on him. with the help a friend who recommended me to Cyberpros who help hack his phone,all his social applications, email, chat, sms and expose him for a cheater he is. I just want to say a big thank you to Cyberhackpros@gmail.com.Incase you need help with hacking any phone or account or other jobs contact him via email/phone (CYBERHACKPROS@GMAIL.COM) or +1 916 378 4978 Tell him i reffered you.He will help you
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