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Driving jokes

  
Requested in Travel & Places by Jokester
edited by MC Hacker

15 Jokes

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Why do men pay more than women for car insurance?
Because women don't get blow jobs while they're driving.
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If your wife wants to learn how to drive don't stand in her way.
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Did you hear about the hermit who was arrested for speeding?
He was charged with recluse driving!
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Bumper Sticker: Pardon my driving... I'm reloading!
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What part of the road is always crying?
The breakdown lane
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A man was driving up a narrow, steep mountain road. A woman drove down the same road.

As they were passing each other the woman leaned out the window and yelled "pig!"

The man immediately leaned out his window and yelled back at her "moron!" The man rounded the next corner and crashed into a pig in the middle of the road.
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Instructor: Do you yield when a blind pedestrian is crossing the road?
Student: What for? He can't see my license plate.
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Patience is something you admire in the driver behind you but can't stand in the driver ahead of you.
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The shortest distance between two points is under construction.
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An idiot is someone driving slower than you. A maniac is anyone going faster than you.
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When everything's coming your way you're in the wrong lane!
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"I used to be a safe driver but it's hell steering those things!"
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