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Short Blonde jokes

  
Requested in Misc. Themes by a contributor
edited by MC Hacker

35 Jokes

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How do you confuse a blonde?
You don't. They're born that way.
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Why don't blondes like making Kool-Aid?
Because they can't fit 8 cups of water in the little packet.
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Postcard from a blonde: "Having a wonderful time. Where am I?"
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What does a blonde owl say?
What? What?
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I looked into a blond's eyes but all I saw was the back of her head!
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What can save a dying blonde?
Hair transplants
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How does a blonde kill a fish?
She drowns it.
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What do you call a blonde with two brain cells?
Pregnant!
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How many blonde jokes are there?
One. The rest are all true.
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Did you hear about the blonde who was an M.D. -- Mentally Deficient?
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How did the blonde kill her toy poodle?
She put batteries in it.
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Why did the blonde return her new scarf?
It was too tight.
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Blondes have more fun but they don't know it.
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How do you make a blonde laugh on Saturday?
Tell her a joke on Wednesday.
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Why did the blonde climb the glass wall?
To see what was on the other side.
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Did you hear about the blonde shoplifter?
She was found dead under K-Mart.
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Why should blondes not be given coffee breaks?
It takes too long to retrain them!
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Did you hear about the blonde whose boyfriend said he loved her?
She believed him!
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Why are the Japanese so smart?
No blondes.
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What do you say to a blonde who won't give in?
"Have another beer."
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Why don't blondes make good truck drivers?
When you give them a good load it takes them 9 months to deliver!
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How can you tell if a blonde's been in your fridge?
There's lipstick on the cucumber.
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Where do blondes go to meet their relatives?
The vegetable garden
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Why was the blonde arrested for public urination?
She saw a sign that said "Stop! Wet floor!"
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How do you kill a blonde?
Give her a gun and tell her it's a hair dryer.
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Why are blondes immune to Mad Cow Disease?
It just affects the brain.
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What are the 2 toughest years of a blonde's life?
6th grade
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Why do blondes stand under light bulbs?
It's the closest they'll ever get to a bright idea!
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What did the blonde girl do when she gave birth to twins?
She bought 2 paternity tests.
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How many blondes does it take to play a game of tag?
One
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How many blonde jokes are there?
One. The rest are all true stories!
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How does a blonde like her eggs in the morning?
Fertilized
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Why do blondes take the pill?
So they know what day of the week it is.
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What do UFO's and smart blondes have in common?
You keep hearing about them but never see any.
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What's the first thing a blonde hears in the morning?
"See ya!"
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