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Teacher jokes

  

17 Jokes

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Teacher: What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
Student: A teacher.
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A teacher is fed up with the lack of effort from her students. She tells the class "stand up if you're stupid" hoping to prove a point. Suddenly Billy stands up. The teacher asks "Billy, are you stupid?" He replies "No, I just didn't want you standing up there by yourself!"
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The teacher tells Billy to stop making ugly faces at other students. "Why, ma'am?" Billy asks her. The teacher says "Because when I was a child my parents told me if I made ugly faces my face would stay that way!" Billy retorts "Well, I can see you didn't listen to them!"
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A student went to his professor's office and said "Professor, I don't believe I deserve this F you gave me!" The professor replied "true but it's the lowest grade they will let me give you."
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1st Boy: I've got a crush on my teacher.
2nd Boy: Man, that is disgusting!
1st Boy: What? Everybody has a crush on their teacher.
2nd Boy: But you're home-schooled!
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How many professors does it take to change a light bulb?
One. But once they get tenure they don't change anymore.
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Why did the teacher write the lesson on the windows?
He wanted the lesson to be very clear!
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Teacher: Class, we're only going to have half a day of school this morning.
Class: Hooray!
Teacher: We'll have the other half this afternoon!
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Teacher: Class, when I ask a question I want you to all answer at once. What is 6 + 4?
Class: At once!
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Time is the best teacher. Unfortunately it kills all of its students!
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How is an English teacher like a judge?
They both give out sentences.
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Why did the teacher go to the beach?
To test the water!
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Why did the teacher wear sunglasses?
Because his class was so bright.
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Why did the teacher turn the lights on?
Because her class was so dim!
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Teacher: Did you miss school yesterday?
Student: Nope! Not really.
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Teacher: If you got $25 from 5 people what would you have?
Student: A new bike!
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Teacher: I hope I didn't just see you looking at Johnny's exam!?
Student: I hope you didn't either!

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